Being a mother and what I like most about my boys

BySandras Phiri

Being a mother.

I love being a mother. In my opinion it is one of the most rewarding ‘jobs’ one can be blessed with. Every day I am in complete awe at the sheer miracle of the fact that two people can come together and make a unique, walking, talking human being. I enjoyed giving birth to both our sons naturally and loved the whole labour process. The pain, sweat, hard work and that ‘I-think-am-gonna die’ feeling that went into bringing each of them into the world was all so worth it. I don’t think anything I have ever achieved or ever will, could ever compare to giving birth. The feeling of reward, satisfaction, awe, humility, amazement and gratitude (mixed-in-one), when I first laid eyes on them, is incomparable! It is like being centre stage in the making of a miracle.

Our sons, Mwenda (8) and Mwai (4), have very different personalities. Despite this they get along very well and love each other very much. They both keep me well entertained with their unique antics. I enjoy conversations with them and listening to them interacting with each other and with friends. I actually have to pinch myself often to believe I had a major role in their ‘making’. I truly am grateful for them and feel very honoured to be their mother. Every day I learn as much from them as they learn from me.

“What I like most about you.”

As a family, we often do an exercise that we call ‘What I like most about you.’ In this exercise, we sit around the living room and each family member takes turns to say what they like most about everyone else. For example if it is my turn, I will say what I like most about Sandras, then what I like most about Mwenda and then what I like most about Mwai. We have done this as a nucleus family as well as with extended family whenever we have them staying over. We have found it to be very beneficial for several reasons and I will share some reasons below:

  1. It makes each one of us feel appreciated for the unique things that make us who we are.
  2. We have found that the affirmation of our good qualities, especially by the people that know us well and whom we love and trust, helps to build us.
  3. It makes us aware of the qualities or actions that each of our family members appreciates most so that we can do more of those things for them.
  4. It is an excellent opportunity to bond and communicate the things that we may otherwise take for granted and would not ordinarily express in our day to day life. For example even though we often say ‘I love you’ to one another, we don’t usually mention the specific things we love and appreciate most.
  5. It is just so much fun! All of us get more and more comfortable with expressing our feelings and Sandras and I get to listen to how wide the boys’ vocabularies are!

I have often spoken and written about the things I like and love about Sandras and so in this article I will talk about our sons and share seven things I like most about each of them.

 

Mwenda (Full name: Mwenda na Lesa)

The meaning of his name: The one who travels with God.
Age: 8
Grade: 2
Star sign: Pisces
 What I like most about him:

  1. He loves people and is a great host (he will even sing and rap for them J)
  2. ­He is a natural leader with the ability to take charge without being forceful
  3. He is a sensitive boy who is aware of, and cares about, other people’s feelings
  4. He is very physically affectionate (we are often bathed in hugs J)
  5. He is good with keeping dates and organizing things
  6. He is super intelligent (we have a ‘wall of fame’ reserved for his school certificates)
  7. He is a great older brother to Mwai (teaches him manners, school stuff and life facts)


Mwai

The meaning of his name: Fortune/good luck 
Age: 4
Grade: Kindergarten-middle class
Star sign: Leo
What I like most about him:

  1. He is fiercely independent
  2. He knows exactly what he wants (and when he wants it J) and is able to express himself clearly
  3. He loves trying out new things and is daring
  4. He is very physically active and athletic
  5. He loves to entertain (often performs some hectic break dance moves)
  6. He is super intelligent with an excellent memory (remembers things from age 2)
  7. He is a great younger brother to Mwenda (compassionate and empathetic whenever Mwenda is upset.)

So now you know a little more about my sons and what makes them unique. I would also love to hear from you about your kids and what you like most about them! If you would like to share then please leave a comment below or write to me on [email protected] and I will be glad to post it here!

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